Author Archives: carrieshare

Sleep Regressions

While we’re on the subject of babies, because that seems to be the biggest focus in my life right now, I want to talk about sleep regressions. My friend Avuhduhbuh teases me because I refuse to buy into the whole “sleep regression” thing. Also, before I begin on that rant, I just need to get […]

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Postpartum Body Image Pt. 2

If you read my last post, you’ll recall that I have approximately 9lbs to lose in order to get back to my pre-baby weight. And you’ll recall that I’m damn sure going to lose them because I don’t feel like expending the energy to “learn to love” my current baby-bod. But I still benefit from […]

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Postpartum Body Image Pt. 1

Dude, its so hard to be female. Let me start out by saying that through both pregnancies, I gained within the recommended weight range for my BMI. I think I maybe reached 30lbs, which is perfectly split between the 25-35lb recommended for me. ::And humblebrag over:: Because BOTH times, after all was said and done, […]

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POSTPARTUM ENNUI

I do not have postpartum depression. I have postpartum ennui. It’s been almost seven weeks with two little ones. Its been almost six months since I’ve worked. It’s been I don’t know how long since I’ve worn anything but yoga pants. Life is grand. You want to know how grand? Here’s how grand: On a […]

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Its only been three and a half years, what?

  Oh Hey. What can happen in three and a half years? Sometimes nothing. However, in looking back on my life, I’m trying to find a three year period in which nothing substantial happened, and well, it hasn’t happened yet. Maybe now that I’m legitimately, like, in my mid-30s WHICH IS STILL NOT MIDDLE AGED […]

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Stupid and the City

  Sex and the City was clever, fashionable and easily digestible TV that I immensely enjoyed watching throughout my 20s. This is despite the fact that my life has never come close to resembling the lives of the women in the show (although, for the record, I spent most of my 20s wishing it could). […]

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Carrie Reads a Magazine for Teenagers

just recently, my mom has begun receiving monthly Seventeen magazines. She is 62. I’d be interested to hear her perspective on them, but she doesn’t read them she just gives them to me, because they are addressed to me. I am 32.

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That time when I ate the Christmas gift I got for my dad

the only thing in my fridge right now is corn tortillas and sriracha.

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On Weirdness

  Its hard to find an image that can truly encompass what it means to be weird, but at least that one is entertaining. Yesterday I went to Bosu Ball class at my gym. Today, I’m sore. They put you on this stability ball and make you jump around and almost twist your ankle a […]

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How to win friends and influence people with cocktails

Anne Hathaway is that frenemy you follow on instagram who is thinner and richer (translation: better) than you, and you really fucking hate her because you want to be thinner and richer too.

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