The Carrie Stardust guide to managing your rockstar lifestyle like a responsible adult

By Carrie Stardust

We have a saying in my band. We’re ‘good at life’; meaning that we’re all perfectly functioning adults.

We just really like making music, playing music, talking about music and making fun of each other. We also all have jobs. So it’s kind of a perfect combination of optimum band dynamics.

People are sometimes shocked when we show up to gigs 15 minutes early, ready to go. And then calmly and efficiently pack up all our gear at the end of the set and load the hell out.

HOWEVER. Don’t you think for a minute that this means that I am not a true fucking rockstar.

I go out pretty much every night, with a wide array of musicians, eccentrics and other creative personalities, I don’t have cable, and I can’t remember what day it is most of the time.  Also, notably, I play keyboards and sing in a rock band.

So regardless of what your definition of a rockstar life style is, that’s mine, and I’m living it.

But… health is of the essence…I’m going to be 30 (AHHHHHHHHHHH) in a few months and I don’t plan to spend it looking like Lindsay Lohan. Plus, I need to continue to be accountable, pay my bills on time, and go to the dentist regularly.

So I’ve managed to find a few ways to maximize fun, funds and general well-being, amidst my  life tendency to be broke, hungover and sleep deprived.

Here are those ways:

1. $12 COCKTAILS & $9 CRAFT BEERS ARE FOR DOUCHEBAGS

I’m not super picky about what I’m drinking. You shouldn’t be either.

Lately my go-to has been the City Wide Special which includes a shot of whiskey and a PBR for $3.

That’s 2 drinks for the price of one, people! Also..as far as efficiency is concerned– shots of whiskey will get the job done.

2. CHECK & BALANCE YOUR VICES

For each cigarette I smoke at night, I eat one serving of produce the following day.

I really don’t eat junk. Like ever. My “empty calories” are saved for alcohol. I try to make everything else that goes into my mouth  insanely nutritious and full of vitamins and minerals.  I don’t know if there’s any scientific evidence that this approach curbs the harmful effects of cigarettes and alcohol but it certainly can’t hurt.

Plus, did you know that people that eat the most fruits & vegetables have the best skin?

3. HYDRATION HYDRATION HYDRATION

I swear by Coconut Water & Emergen-C as the ultimate hangover cure. Coconut water is super expensive, which sucks, so I only get it maybe once or twice every two weeks, but I get the Rite-Aid brand of Emergen-C and drink one of those packets in water every day.

In fact, occasionally I’ll order vodka & water at a bar and then add a packet of Emergen-C to it–this goes back to my checks & balances system.

It hydrates while it intoxicates!

4. DRUGS ARE FOR DOUCHEBAGS

Stay away from them. Not only do they make you look & feel like shit, but they’re mad expensive. I hate to sound like Sally Guidance Counselor and obviously I don’t judge, but mehhh…they’re certainly not conducive to my rockstar lifestyle.

5. FOOD TRUCKS ARE YOUR FRIENDS

Particularly the produce food trucks. You can get a ginormo bag of grapes, pineapple, melon, berries PLUS a whole banana for $3! Thats 2-3 days worth of breakfasts to me, and something similar at Superfresh would be like seven bucks.

Also, egg & cheese sandwiches are like $2.50 and they’re like 9″ long. More than enough for 2 meals.

6. INVEST IN REALLY GOOD MOISTURIZER, BUT BUY MAKEUP FROM THE DRUGSTORE

I have really expensive anti-aging moisturizer and eye cream. Everything else I get from CVS. So far no one has noticed and I don’t have any wrinkles. I’m fine with this arrangement.

7. FLOSS

Ok so I don’t floss ALL the time but I know I should and I certainly try to.

8. CARRY EARPLUGS

Having just come back from a band tour, I can’t stress this enough. Ear plugs serve a dual purpose.  Not only do they protect your ears from really loud, shitty bands in rock clubs, but they also protect your ability to sleep in trying circumstances. Getting enough hours of sleep isn’t the only concern, the quality of sleep can make all the difference, and you never know where you might have to crash.

Ear plugs will keep you from waking up 17 times in 4 hours because your boyfriend won’t stop snoring, or because there’s feral cats outside of your hotel room, or your next door neighbor really likes buzzsawing at 7AM.

All of these things have happened to me, PS.

9. CAFFEINATE WITH COFFEE

Well, duh. Not only is coffee the ultimate energy-jolter, it also has mucho antioxidants. In fact, its the #1 source of antioxidants for the majority of the American population.

Occasionally I will grab a Red Bull or something but I try to go natural when I can.

10. GO FOR JUST ONE DRINK

The next time someone invites you out. Even if you’re exhausted, even if you haven’t showered, even if it’s midnight and you just got done unpacking all of your stuff (all of this has also happened to me), GO!

You never know who you might meet!  Your next  Foo Fighters night* could be just over the horizon!

If you have one drink and are still not feeling it. Go home. You have my blessing.

…

So there you have it…

Hey that’s 10 ways… Exactly..

Ehhh..that’s almost too well-packaged to be rockstar…I need to add another tip….

11. NEVER LISTEN TO THE BAND FUN

So lame.

So, so, so lame.

Andddddddddddd I’m off!

*Those spontaneous, incredible nights that remind you that you’re both mortal and still young. They also make you want to sing that song.